Wednesday, 2 December 2009

The Wind

I gave myself to the wind
And it carried me to where you are
When I met you, I kissed the skies
And I danced in swirls like the fallen leaves
Would not want to touch the ground.

I made friends with the wind
And flewn free like a kite
I explored the skies holding your hand
The wind caresses me like your embrace
You could not be so far.

I felt the wind all around me
Keeping me afloat in the heavens, beyond the skies
But it is not really the wind that carries me
It’s you, my love, who kept me high
Carry me. Love me. Don’t stop. Never tire.

Sunday, 22 November 2009

Images and Words


LOVE AT SUNSET

"As when love moves your heart to dance and the music in your ears never stops -
It is when you give out all yourself, not just your heart, but your body.. your soul.. and your mind..
When you arise to see your future in a mystical warming and securing light -
Then you place the entirety of your very being into the palm of your lover's hand."

by TsoCo Lat


Photo Credit: Photobucket.com

Sunday, 15 November 2009

Random Thoughts


I draw a line, create a circle and fill the blank space with colors. I would define a curve and illuminate objects, bringing life to an empty canvass and please my very eyes. But does it pleases my heart?
When you smile, when you laugh, when I see you happy – I feel like an angel touching you. When you are sad and crying - I am no less than a comic figure without a heart, without a soul.

Monday, 2 November 2009

The Ringless 'Ring' Finger

I was staring at the blank computer screen while trying to find a subject of what I will write today when my eyes found my ‘ringless’ ring finger. Suddenly, it zapped my thoughts and I could not settle on what I should feel.

But on one part of it, I know that I am happy.

No one owns me. There’s no one who put limits on what I do or where I go. I can attend parties, hang out with friends, wear anything I want and I don’t have to worry about explaining what I do or where I’ve been to someone. I can get take-outs for dinner, go home late and wake up late. It wouldn’t matter at all because I only have myself to take care of. In short, I am free. Yes, that’s what it means by having ‘no ring’ on my ring finger.

I am not anybody’s wife.

If someone would make me wear the ring, that would mean I should be home on time. No more strolling around the malls, no more hanging out with friends every night and less parties. So I would get extra time for chopping the vegetables in the kitchen, doing the laundry and planning the meals for the whole week. I might also have to give up watching the television ‘til the wee hours of the morning because he wanted it quiet when he sleeps. Plus the fact that I don’t have the bed only for myself anymore, I should be a little careful in shifting my sleeping positions during the night. And then there’s the battle whether to keep the lampshade on or off. And do I really have to share the blanket?

Maybe wearing the ring means having to compromise.. and to share.. and to care.. and to let my significant other know that I have to meet some friends after work or I will be late for home. Well, for a woman like me, that’s gonna be a lot of work to do. But on the other hand, I can think about the man who will make me wear the ring. He would have to be really determined to take me as his wife. And for a man to give me his name and to tell the world how much he loves me as he would prove it by the ring, well, that’s gonna be way too important for him than all the football games and board meetings. Much more to say that he’d like me to have his little ones.

That will be an adventure I have yet to discover.

The ring would totally transform my world to having goodmorning kisses, romantic nights, baby bumps and moving my father’s surname to be my middle name.

But what does it really takes for me to wear the ring? The answer could only be Love.

Then I looked again on my finger and wished that someday, I will be wearing one.

Or maybe not?

Photo Credit:  excellent-wedding.cn

Monday, 19 October 2009

A Sad Lament

Like how the desert thirst for even the fewest drops of rain, I missed you. Unfathomable as it may seem to many but I am aching for a moment just to have a sight of you. To hold you would be a stroke of my luck and to love you will be the fate that I would trade the world for. I love you, my everdearest. Though this may sound just like a poetic piece of literature, understand that these words would not be written if my heart is empty and not beating.

You crashed into me one day and our pieces collided altogether that we cannot isolate each from the other. I cannot part myself from you and you from me. We are entwined. It is only human to feel that I am one with you. I submit myself. I surrender.

I felt love in its highest form. Forgiving, unselfish and trusting. This is what you have made me of. There is no reason to refuse it. You are the water that flows in the stream and I am just flowing with you, not being afraid of the fall at the end because right then, I knew that however high the fall would be, you are still with me, enveloping me with your current - because we are whole. The plunge may be deep or the bottom could be rocky and it may hurt but you are with me. And I could find peace with that thought.

However the time and distance separates us now, not even in a brief second of my conscious and unconscious self have you ever parted from my existence on this temporal Earth. We are holding on that one day, we will be together and it will happen someday. Though it may still be a far away place and the absence sometimes makes the hope futile and the someday appears bleak, I believe that I could reach that place with you. The longing only keeps me alive and wanting.

My beloved, you will be the reality of my dreams. And if this is a fairy tale that I am living now, I beseech you to be my real-life Prince. I know in my heart that I could love only you and your love would be enough to keep me forever.

Each day is the beginning of the rest of our lives and I could only regret of the days that I am not with you. It is the sad lament of a heart that loves.

Tuesday, 13 October 2009

The Battle Between the Heart and the Mind

“One is so brainy, the other is too emotional. At what point could they ever compromise? Or would they ever.. ever compromise?”

With all hair neatly packed up with a big clasp, she wore her black-framed eyeglasses and slipped on her 2-inch heeled shoes that goes with her dark gray suit. One more look in the full-length mirror, pleased with what she saw, then off she go. Smart. Intelligent. Strong. She is a Woman. She will walk confidently and will face the world with firmness like nothing on Earth is negotiable. It’s all in the mind. Everything is in the mind. It was all that matters.

Her ally will greet the world each day depending on the emotion she feels. Her hair lightly falls down on her back & shoulders. She takes time to smell the roses and hear songs. She laughs, she cries. She can wear a smile all day when she is happy and she can stay up all-night crying with her broken-heart. Loving. Caring. Subtle. She is a Woman. What she feels in her heart is all that matters. Love is what makes the world goes round. Without it, the world would stop turning.

When these two are together, that is when the battle begins. And they are practically together each moment of their lives so the battle continuously lives.
“Why can’t you put that smile off?”, the Mind asks the Heart noticing that the other is so blissful one night. “Is there anything you want to tell me?”

The Heart gave her a grin. Her eyes are sparkling with what she feels. “You wouldn’t believe how wonderful this guy I met was. He’s just the reality of all my dreams.” And she danced & swirled around the room.

The Mind just stayed put, took off her glasses, turned her lampshade off and without anymore questions, she said, “You should not trust anyone. Don’t get fooled, am telling you.”

The Heart only smiled and dreamingly pulled her blanket up. With the guy in her thoughts, she whispered, “Tonight, please be in my dreams.” and closed her eyes.

In the morning, before the Mind left the house, she wrote a note for the Heart. It says, “ I only care about you. Don’t open up to anyone that would break you into pieces in the end.”

One afternoon after shopping, they are seated on an ice cream parlor in a walkway when suddenly the mobile phone rings. The Mind stared at the Heart closely while the latter was engaged on the call. Afterwards, the Mind asked her, “Same guy?”

With smiles almost reaching her ears, the Heart said, “Yes. He is so sweet and funny and… he likes me.. he even said he loves me.. and I like him, too.. he is one great guy.. isn’t that wonderful?” The Mind can see stars in the Heart’s eyes and she was worried that the Heart is falling in love. She shook her head.
The Mind held the Heart by the hand and told her, “How could you trust that he loves you? How did you know that he is a good person? Nobody knows him. How can you tell me he’s not just playing around? He might be fooling you. And you’re letting yourself be hooked. You are crazy. I already warned you.” The Mind was unbending.

The Heart knows that the Mind would never ever understand what she feels. And yes, she is in love. And it is not a question whether the guy is real or just a fantasy. Right now, the only thing that matters is she feels love and she believes him. Deep inside, she believes that he loves her.

The days had been beautiful. The flowers are pretty. It was so easy to smile and appreciate all the little things around. The Heart and the Mind have not talked as often as before so the Heart left a note one time in the Mind’s bed saying, “I know how much you care and I can only ask you to be happy for me.”

Until one day, the Mind came home and found the Heart in tears. She already knows it. The Heart never listens.. and worse.. she never learns. She went close to her, wiped her tears and whispered to her, “Cry it out loud.. you are just as stubborn as you always are.”

The Heart wrapped her arms tightly to the Mind knowing that she will stand with her no matter how things may be. She heard the Mind saying, “I couldn’t feel like you do but I can always think. That’s what I do. You need me and you got to listen to me. We cannot go our own separate ways. We have to be there for each other at all times.”

“I could only feel.. You would just hear me throbbing and there is no season for it.. There could only be Love and I would open myself when I feel it.. I would not let it pass.. even if it would hurt me in the end.”, the Heart says in between sobs.

The Mind comforted the Heart. “I will look after you from now on. You should let me.”

It took sometime for them to work on things together. It’s not easy to just go with what the other wants. But they were trying to learn how to meet halfway.
In one party they’ve been invited, the Mind saw a guy smiling at her. She just turned her eyes away and look for friends. She noticed the Heart smiling back at the guy.

“You’re starting again!”, the Mind speaks.

Still smiling, “He looks gorgeous, don’t you think?”, the Heart says.

Raising her brows and folding her arms, the Mind turned again to the Heart saying, “He’s dressed nicely but he looks like a Casanova who’s sweeping off the girls feet all over town. You wouldn’t want to be in his list.”

“Oh c’mon, dear. Who knows? He could be the love of my life..”, the Heart begs the Mind.

They heard a strange voice not from afar, telling them, “You’ll never know unless you would take a chance.”

Startled, they both asked, “Who are you?”

Laughing at their confusion, the voice speaks, “It’s me.. the Spirit.. or you can call me Guts.. am your hidden buddy. But now, I need to surface-out between the two of you.”

The Guts continued, “Take a chance, Heart, so you would not be wondering all your life with all the ‘what-could-have-beens’ but always be guarded, and that’s the job for the Mind to do. Don’t walk out on each other and never ignore the other. Compromise is the best thing to always do in life and in love.”

The Mind and the Heart couldn’t react to what they just heard. The Guts is right. That’s the way to do it. And before they even realized, the Guts disappears.

They were surprised to see the good-looking guy walking in their direction.
“Hi, I couldn’t believe that an angel would be in a place like this at this hour of the night”, the guy tries to charm her.

The Heart smiles while the Mind is on the lookout. She said her name and accepts the handshake the guy offered.

That same night upon reaching home, they both found a note on the table. It says, “I always work on call. Just call on me when you need me.”

And the battle came to rest.

Tuesday, 1 September 2009

The Place

The moment you found me-
It was like I found the place I have longed all my life to be.
I know that I have been threading the journey in the past until now
From where I am before, to where I am now
Because this is where you’ll find me.

In this place,
Where you have been pulling me towards you all this time
And it is only now that I knew
That I have been falling towards you all my life.
The first smile you put on my lips speaks of the enchantment I felt
Even before meeting you
And which I knew would not end there.

How you are making me feel was unspeakable
Each moment with you is eternity
Every beat of my heart goes only to you.
If I could be with you only in my dreams
I would just close my eyes and fall into sleep and be with you.
I wanted to be lost in the feel of your embrace
When your strong arms would hold me like you’ll never let me go
And I will stay there forever.

The magic will go on
Even when the stars would stop sparkling
And the fairies would sleep on us
I don’t need pixie dusts to be able to fly
Because my heart can soar on its own with your love.

And I will turn like a waterwheel
Not wanting to stop, not wanting to end…
Continuously bathing in all of you…
Only wanting to love you.

I will paint images of you in the skies,
I will say your name over and over like a refrain,
I will greet each sunrise with a smile
And I will rest my body at night hearing our songs.
I will be with you because there’s nowhere else for me to be
And there’s no other way to call it but home.

You are my home.
Your heart is my only home.
And that’s the only place I need to be.